The Five-Minute Forums  

Go Back   The Five-Minute Forums > FiveMinute.net > Fiver By Committee
Register FAQ Community Calendar Today's Posts Search

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 03-17-2004, 07:00 PM
Zeke's Avatar
Zeke Zeke is offline
The lens that flares in the night
Administrator
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Ottawa, ON
Posts: 3,405
Send a message via ICQ to Zeke Send a message via AIM to Zeke Send a message via Yahoo to Zeke
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Cypher, who arranged to get separated from the others, calls Tank for an exit. Â Tank directs him to one, then sends the others to the same one when they call. Â He pulls Cypher out, and starts the phone ringing to bring out the others -- but the phone goes silent as soon as Neo picks it up. Â Cypher has blasted Tank and Dozer with an electric rifle, the latter fatally. Â Trinity calls the Operator on her cell phone and gets Cypher, who begins to rant about (1) how he used to love her, (2) what a jerk Morpheus is, and (3) how he believes the Matrix is now a better choice than the real world, and can be just as real. Â With that lead-in, he starts killing the rest of the team: first Apoc, then Switch. Â Contemplating Neo, he asks Trinity if she really believes Morpheus' "bullshit." Â She says yes, he protests, and at that point Tank blasts the crap out of Cypher with his own weapon. Â Back in control, he pulls the two surviving team members out.

I'm really not sure how many scenes we need here. Â It's a critical part of the movie, and one of my favourites (Cypher was a backstabbing bastard, but I think there's some merit in his argument about the Matrix). Â I'll let you guys figure out the right length as you go. Â Synopsis is here and here.

As for time limits and such, that system so far isn't working, so I'm not going to try anything formal this block. Â However, I've noticed you guys seem to post a lot in the first two days and then drop off. Â Here's my suggestion: after the first two days, if you don't have any more ideas of your own, why not comment on others' scenes or suggest tweaks to them? Â That would keep things active longer, I think.[/colorost_uid0]

  #2  
Old 03-17-2004, 09:24 PM
Gatac's Avatar
Gatac Gatac is offline
Man in the iron mask
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Magdeburg, Germany
Posts: 667
Send a message via ICQ to Gatac Send a message via AIM to Gatac
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0][bost_uid0]Cypher:[/bost_uid0] There's no place like home, there's no place like home...
[bost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] Gotcha, Dorothy. Toto and the gang's heading for ya, too.
[bost_uid0]Cypher:[/bost_uid0] Drat! Er, I mean, good to hear that they got away.
[bost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] Oh, stop it with the double-takes, you're killing me.
[bost_uid0]Cypher:[/bost_uid0] Truer words have not been spoken.

[bost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] Pseudo-GAK!
[bost_uid0]Dozer:[/bost_uid0] GAK!
[bost_uid0]Switch:[/bost_uid0] GAK!
[bost_uid0]Apoc:[/bost_uid0] GAK!
[bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Hm, something's wrong here, but I can't quite put my finger on it.

[bost_uid0]Cypher:[/bost_uid0] No! It cannot be! I...I killed you! I sucked you dry and threw away your empty carcass!
[bost_uid0]Kool-Aid Man:[/bost_uid0] Oh yeah?
[bost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] Stuff it, John Mirra. And get back to your screens.
[bost_uid0]Cypher:[/bost_uid0] But mirrors are more fun than television!
[bost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] That may very well be, but I'd like to remind you to EAT FLAMING DEATH, FLEMOID!
[bost_uid0]Cypher:[/bost_uid0] Got me there. GAK!

Gatac[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
Katy: Can I have the skill 'drive car off bridge and have parachute handy'?
Justin: It's kind of a limited skill.
Greg: Depends on how often you drive off bridges.
- d02 Quotes
  #3  
Old 03-18-2004, 04:16 AM
NeoMatrix's Avatar
NeoMatrix NeoMatrix is offline
Factorial
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Augusta, GA
Posts: 6,139
Send a message via AIM to NeoMatrix Send a message via MSN to NeoMatrix Send a message via Yahoo to NeoMatrix
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Cypher: Beam me back
Tank: You been beemed
Cypher: Now im beaming you
Tank: GAK! (aside)Ouch!
Dozer: GAK!

Cypher: Neo is next, so say good bye to him now.
Trinity: No, Ill wait for the 3rd movie
Cypher: So you are saying some kind of miracle is going to stop me from pulling this plug right now in the 1st movie?
Trinity: Yes, and always to make sure you killed the person you were trying to kill.
Cypher: Uh oh...GAK!
Tank: The fake GAK gets them every time.
Neo: Perhaps I should try that sometime.[/colorost_uid0]
  #4  
Old 03-18-2004, 10:08 AM
Standback's Avatar
Standback Standback is offline
Transformed Man
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: My own little bubble. It's a pink bubble.
Posts: 671
Send a message via ICQ to Standback Send a message via MSN to Standback Send a message via Yahoo to Standback
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Love this:
[quoteost_uid0]Tank: The fake GAK gets them every time.
Neo: Perhaps I should try that sometime.[/quoteost_uid0]
And this:
[quoteost_uid0]Tank: Pseudo-GAK!
Dozer: GAK!
Switch: GAK!
Apoc: GAK!
Neo: Hm, something's wrong here, but I can't quite put my finger on it.[/quoteost_uid0]
It'd be funnier if Tank wasn't first; though I guess we probably don't want to change that. Maybe just switch Tank and Dozer? (GAK, Pseudo-GAK, GAK, GAK)...[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
Sal: Where\'s he goin\'?
Joyce: To get his nachitos back from the aliens.
Sal: What? By himself?
--It\'s Walky!, David Willis
  #5  
Old 03-18-2004, 01:35 PM
Derek's Avatar
Derek Derek is offline
Dean of misderektion
Senior Staff
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Sector 001
Posts: 1,106
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Alright, borrowing from other people and incorporating some of my own stuff. (Note that the second scene ends with Cypher, [iost_uid0]not Neo[/iost_uid0].)

[bost_uid0]Cypher:[/bost_uid0] I escaped from the Agents! Maybe [iost_uid0]I'm[/iost_uid0] the One.
[bost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] (over the phone) You think you're the One? Ha ha, stop it, you're killing me.
[bost_uid0]Cypher:[/bost_uid0] Not yet, but I will be soon.

[bost_uid0]Dozer:[/bost_uid0] GAK!
[bost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] Pseudo-GAK!
[bost_uid0]Switch:[/bost_uid0] GAK!
[bost_uid0]Apoc:[/bost_uid0] GAK!
[bost_uid0]Cypher:[/bost_uid0] Hm, something's wrong here, but I can't quite put my finger on it.

[bost_uid0]Cypher:[/bost_uid0] Mwahaha! Nothing can stop me now, I'm invincible! Don't you wish you were on my side now, Trinity?
[bost_uid0]Trinity:[/bost_uid0] Not after the way you just jinxed yourself.
[bost_uid0]Cypher:[/bost_uid0] What do you mean? It's not like Tank survived, grabbed the gun, and -- GAK!
[bost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] Heh. The fake GAK gets them every time.
[bost_uid0]Neo:[/bost_uid0] Perhaps I should try that sometime.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
"Please, Aslan," said Lucy, "what do you call soon?"
"I call all times soon," said Aslan; and instantly he vanished away and Lucy was alone with the Magician.
  #6  
Old 03-18-2004, 05:03 PM
Pteryx's Avatar
Pteryx Pteryx is offline
Spritely
Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Auburn, ME
Posts: 73
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]I think we've got some of it pretty well figured out already. I like what Derek did with people's ideas for the second and third blocks. Now to figure out my own take on the first...

[quoteost_uid0][bost_uid0]Cypher[/bost_uid0]: Tank, get me out of here! The others'll catch up!
[bost_uid0]Tank[/bost_uid0]: Sure thing! After all, you're on our side, right?[/quoteost_uid0][/colorost_uid0]
  #7  
Old 03-18-2004, 05:09 PM
NAHTMMM's Avatar
NAHTMMM NAHTMMM is offline
Noodles And Hot Tofu! MMM
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: St Louis, MO, USA, . . .
Posts: 2,973
Send a message via Yahoo to NAHTMMM
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Some good stuff so far


[quoteost_uid0]Cypher: Thanks for being so kind as to pull me out of there. Now I'll kill you for it.
Tank: Erm, "GAK!"
Dozer: GAK!
Apoc: GAK!
Mouse: I am [iost_uid0]so[/iost_uid0] glad I'm not in this scene.
Switch: GAK!

Cypher: It's gonna take a miracle to save you now, Neo!
Neo: I have just four words for you, Cypher: "I'm in the sequels".
Tank: And I've got two words for you--Die, sucka!
Cypher: One word: GAK![/quoteost_uid0]

[quoteost_uid0]Cypher: I know what you're thinking, "Am I really the One?" I wasn't sure, but since Morpheus said you are then I know you aren't. The question you gotta ask yourself is: do you feel lucky, punk?[/quoteost_uid0]



(Edit) Just remembered...

[quoteost_uid0](Note that the second scene ends with Cypher, not Neo.)[/quoteost_uid0]
Whether or not that was a typo, I thought it worked with Neo too. Everybody's dying, Trinity's yelling at Cypher, Cypher is ranting about how disillusioned he is, and Neo still isn't entirely sure that this isn't all part of the routine... :smile:[/colorost_uid0]

__________________
My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list

Yup

“There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs
  #8  
Old 03-18-2004, 11:14 PM
Standback's Avatar
Standback Standback is offline
Transformed Man
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: My own little bubble. It's a pink bubble.
Posts: 671
Send a message via ICQ to Standback Send a message via MSN to Standback Send a message via Yahoo to Standback
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Random thoughts. Damn, I'm tired.

[bost_uid0]Cypher:[/bost_uid0] Tank, gimme an exit quick, so I can kill everybody before you can stop me!
[bost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] Cypher, did you just say--
[bost_uid0]Cypher:[/bost_uid0] Allow me to rephrase that...

(preferably after the multiple GAK-block)
[bost_uid0]Trinity:[/bost_uid0] Dammit, Cypher, why are you doing this to us?
[bost_uid0]Cypher:[/bost_uid0] The poster's only wide enough for three characters.

[bost_uid0]Cypher:[/bost_uid0] Now Neo can't be the One, can he? Because I'm about to kill him, right, Trinity? And you can't do a thing--GAK!
[bost_uid0]Tank:[/bost_uid0] Sheesh. It's number 7 on the Evil Overlord List.[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
Sal: Where\'s he goin\'?
Joyce: To get his nachitos back from the aliens.
Sal: What? By himself?
--It\'s Walky!, David Willis
  #9  
Old 03-18-2004, 11:22 PM
PointyHairedJedi's Avatar
PointyHairedJedi PointyHairedJedi is offline
He'd enjoy a third pie
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: The Scotlands
Posts: 4,354
Send a message via ICQ to PointyHairedJedi Send a message via AIM to PointyHairedJedi Send a message via Yahoo to PointyHairedJedi
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]I might try and come up with something tomorrow, but I think Derek has pretty much nailed it with his composite block.[/colorost_uid0]

__________________
Mason: Luckily we at the Agency use use a high-tech piece of software that will let us spot him instantly via high-res satellite images.
Sergeant: You can? That's amazing!
Mason: Yes. We call it 'Google Earth'.
- Five Minute 24 S1 (it lives, honest!)

"Everybody loves pie!"
- Spongebob Squarepants
  #10  
Old 03-19-2004, 08:04 AM
NeoMatrix's Avatar
NeoMatrix NeoMatrix is offline
Factorial
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Augusta, GA
Posts: 6,139
Send a message via AIM to NeoMatrix Send a message via MSN to NeoMatrix Send a message via Yahoo to NeoMatrix
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Tank: You got the wrong phone plan.
Cypher: GAK!

Tank: Got minutes?
Cypher: GAK!

Tank: Seems like you are out of minutes.
Cypher: Yep GAK!

Tank: Pop Quiz. You know what happens to the bad guy after they give long speaches?
Cypher: They die?
Tank: Correct!
Cypher: Yay! GAK!

Tank: You missed me.
Cypher: But you aren't in the sequels.
Tank: You aren't either.
Cypher: Oh, you're right. GAK!
Tank: Trinity, why am I not in the sequels?
Trinity: Ask Morpheus.[/colorost_uid0]
  #11  
Old 03-19-2004, 02:41 PM
NAHTMMM's Avatar
NAHTMMM NAHTMMM is offline
Noodles And Hot Tofu! MMM
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: St Louis, MO, USA, . . .
Posts: 2,973
Send a message via Yahoo to NAHTMMM
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0]Cypher: Wheee, hijack time!
Tank: ACK!
Dozer: GAK!
Cypher: Hey Trinity, Morpheus stinks. And I used to maybe think that I kinda sorta possibly liked you, but when I found out you loathe [iost_uid0]American Idol[/iost_uid0]...[/quoteost_uid0]

[quoteost_uid0]Cypher: This rebellion will die, Neo, as will your friends.
Apoc and Switch: GAK!
Cypher: And now, my young Anderson...you will die.
Tank: *ZAP*
Cypher: GAK![/quoteost_uid0]



Oh, NeoMatrix's stuff gives me an idea...

[quoteost_uid0]Apoc and Switch: GAK!
Cypher: Your call has been disconnected. Please hang up and try again. ...Heheh, I always wanted to say that.[/quoteost_uid0][/colorost_uid0]

__________________
My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list

Yup

“There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs
  #12  
Old 03-20-2004, 02:34 AM
Scooter's Avatar
Scooter Scooter is offline
Doctoral candidate
Staff
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Earth, again
Posts: 831
Send a message via AIM to Scooter
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Cypher: Great job pulling me back, Tank. Allow me to say "thank you."
Tank: Can you say it without the gun?

Trinity: Tank, are you there? Are you screening your calls? It's Trinity.
Cypher: The Operator you are trying to reach has been disconnected.
Trinity: Cypher? What are you doing?
Cypher: Look, can you honestly say that you're better off with this dead-eyed airhead, saving our crappy real lives, than living with me in fantasyland?
Trinity: Compared to you, I'd be better off with a famished cannibal.
Tank: Hey, Cypher! Allow me to say--"you're welcome!"
Cypher: Lethal irony sucks. GAK![/colorost_uid0]

__________________
An updated list of all my online writing can be found here. Check it out.
  #13  
Old 03-20-2004, 03:38 AM
Pteryx's Avatar
Pteryx Pteryx is offline
Spritely
Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Auburn, ME
Posts: 73
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Scooter's got another good idea here, though his second block could stand to be shortened:

[quoteost_uid0]
[bost_uid0]Cypher[/bost_uid0]: Hey Trinibabe, can you honestly say that you're better off with this dead-eyed airhead, saving our crappy real lives, than living with me in fantasyland?
[bost_uid0]Trinity[/bost_uid0]: Compared to you, I'd be better off with a famished cannibal.
[bost_uid0]Tank[/bost_uid0]: Hey, Cypher! Allow me to say--"you're welcome!"
[bost_uid0]Cypher[/bost_uid0]: Lethal irony sucks. GAK![/quoteost_uid0][/colorost_uid0]
  #14  
Old 03-20-2004, 05:46 AM
Scooter's Avatar
Scooter Scooter is offline
Doctoral candidate
Staff
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Earth, again
Posts: 831
Send a message via AIM to Scooter
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0="Pteryx"]Scooter's got another good idea here, though his second block could stand to be shortened:[/quoteost_uid0]
Well, Pteryx has a point, my original submission could be tightened. Redux:

[bost_uid0]Cypher[/bost_uid0]: Great job pulling me back, Tank. Allow me to say "thank you."
[bost_uid0]Tank[/bost_uid0]: Can you say it without the gun?

[bost_uid0]Cypher[/bost_uid0]: Hey Trinity, are you really better off with this airhead, saving our crappy real lives, than living with me in fantasyland?
[bost_uid0]Trinity[/bost_uid0]: Compared to you, I'd be better off with a famished cannibal.
[bost_uid0]Tank[/bost_uid0]: Hey, Cypher! Allow me to say--"you're welcome!"
[bost_uid0]Cypher[/bost_uid0]: Lethal irony sucks. GAK!


Though I did like the "disconnected" line. [/colorost_uid0]
__________________
An updated list of all my online writing can be found here. Check it out.
  #15  
Old 03-20-2004, 08:23 PM
NAHTMMM's Avatar
NAHTMMM NAHTMMM is offline
Noodles And Hot Tofu! MMM
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: St Louis, MO, USA, . . .
Posts: 2,973
Send a message via Yahoo to NAHTMMM
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0][quoteost_uid0]Cypher: You have no clue what they've promised me, Trinity. I'll have a great life as a rich and famous movie star, I'll never be hungry or cold again, I won't remember a moment of the misery I've been going through, I'll never have to pay long-distance charges again...
Trinity: Who's "they"? The Agents?
Cypher: Them and the 10-10-220 people. They're still mad at Neo for hacking them. Which reminds me...[/quoteost_uid0][/colorost_uid0]
__________________
My 5MV webpages My novel fivers list

Yup

“There must have been a point in early human history when it was actually advantageous to, when confronted with a difficult task, drop it altogether and go do something more fun, because I do that way too often for it to be anything but instinct.” -- Isto Combs
  #16  
Old 03-20-2004, 11:10 PM
NeoMatrix's Avatar
NeoMatrix NeoMatrix is offline
Factorial
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Augusta, GA
Posts: 6,139
Send a message via AIM to NeoMatrix Send a message via MSN to NeoMatrix Send a message via Yahoo to NeoMatrix
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Cypher: Great job pulling me back, Tank. Allow me to say "thank you."
Tank: Can you say it without the gun?
Cypher: Hmmm, no GAK!

Cypher: If Neo is the One, then there has to be some kind of a miracle that stops me.
Trinity: One miracle coming up!
Tank: Hey, Cypher! Allow me to say--"you're welcome!"
Cypher: Lethal irony sucks. GAK![/colorost_uid0]
  #17  
Old 03-21-2004, 12:41 AM
Pteryx's Avatar
Pteryx Pteryx is offline
Spritely
Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Auburn, ME
Posts: 73
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Another composite for consideration:

[quoteost_uid0][bost_uid0]Cypher[/bost_uid0]: Great job pulling me back, Tank. Allow me to say "thank you."
[bost_uid0]Tank[/bost_uid0]: Can you say it without the gun? "GAK!"
[bost_uid0]Cypher[/bost_uid0]: Hm, something's wrong here, but I can't quite put my finger on it.

[bost_uid0]Cypher[/bost_uid0]: Hey Trinity, are you really better off with this airhead, saving our crappy real lives, than living with me in fantasyland?
[bost_uid0]Trinity[/bost_uid0]: Compared to you, I'd be better off with a famished cannibal.
[bost_uid0]Tank[/bost_uid0]: Hey, Cypher! Allow me to say--"you're welcome!"
[bost_uid0]Cypher[/bost_uid0]: Lethal irony sucks. GAK!
[bost_uid0]Tank[/bost_uid0]: Heh. The fake GAK gets them every time.
[bost_uid0]Neo[/bost_uid0]: Maybe I should try that sometime.[/quoteost_uid0][/colorost_uid0]
  #18  
Old 03-21-2004, 04:49 AM
Scooter's Avatar
Scooter Scooter is offline
Doctoral candidate
Staff
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Earth, again
Posts: 831
Send a message via AIM to Scooter
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]Hmmm... not without coolness...[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
An updated list of all my online writing can be found here. Check it out.
  #19  
Old 03-23-2004, 03:53 AM
Scooter's Avatar
Scooter Scooter is offline
Doctoral candidate
Staff
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Earth, again
Posts: 831
Send a message via AIM to Scooter
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]So! Are we ready to start voting?[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
An updated list of all my online writing can be found here. Check it out.
  #20  
Old 03-23-2004, 04:56 AM
Zeke's Avatar
Zeke Zeke is offline
The lens that flares in the night
Administrator
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Ottawa, ON
Posts: 3,405
Send a message via ICQ to Zeke Send a message via AIM to Zeke Send a message via Yahoo to Zeke
Default

[color=#000000ost_uid0]I think it's important to include Cypher's serial murder of the minor characters. May I humbly suggest that whatever line you pick for Cypher be interspersed as follows?

[bost_uid0]Cypher:[/bost_uid0] Hey Trinity, are you really -- YANK! (kills Apoc) -- better off with this airhead, saving our -- YANK! (kills Switch) -- crappy real lives, than living with me in fantasyland?

(Also, this scene needs an "over the phone" stage direction on one side or the other.)[/colorost_uid0]
__________________
FiveMinute.net: because stuff is long and life is short

[03:17] FiveMinZeke: Galactica clearly needs the advanced technology of scissors, which get around the whole "yanking on your follicles" problem.
[03:17] IJD: cylons can hack any blades working in conjunction
Closed Thread


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 01:08 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.2
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.