15 minute "Hamlet" - The Five-Minute Forums

Hotaru · #1 10-01-2004, 01:18 AM

So there I was, mindlessly flipping through my english book. Entitled "Hamlet and other related readings", I figured I would be bored out of mind. It's not like English is much fun, but reading what people think about Shakspeare, now there is fun! I mean did you know there is a Hamletology? It's so incredible, it's... it's... *falls asleep*

But then I saw it, in the book, staring at me in big, bold letters...

15 Minute Hamlet

I was shocked, and amazed! I began reading it... only to discover it wasn't funny. No, not funny, it was Hamlet in 15 minutes, if you wanted to know the PLOT and major events and stuff. I was a little dissapointed, but that was the highlight of my english class (yes, the highlight of my english class was the title of a thingy, english is REALLY boring) and I figured I would share it with you.

Expect to see pictures soon! I'm so bored....

I would like to apologize to anyone who likes/teaches english/shakspeare, I just find it really boring.

I wonder how small "Tiny" is...

mudshark · #2 10-01-2004, 01:37 AM

You could always do it this way, but it's not especially funny, either. Hamlet as Shakespeare wrote it, however, does have some funny bits, if a bit darkish.

Hotaru · #3 10-01-2004, 01:41 AM

Oh, as well, last week I saw "5-Minute Calgary Herald", in the newspaper. I think somebody has decided that Zeke has a good idea going here, and is spreading it to everything I see!

NeoMatrix · #4 10-01-2004, 01:46 AM

I would love a 5 minute Lecture, lol

Sa'ar Chasm · #5 10-01-2004, 02:47 AM

There was a king sitting in his garden
When his brother in his ear poured a vial full of hemling,
Stole his money and his crown, and his widow
But the king came down to haunt his son, and said "Hey, kiddo"
I'm your father and it's your duty to avenge my death on Claudius,
kill him quick and clean and tell the nation what a fraud he was.
The kid said "Well, I'll do it, but I'll have to play it crafty,
And so no one will suspect me I'll let on that I'm a dafty."

And so on, and so forth. I forget the rest, except for the last line:
And Fortinbras, knee-deep in Danes, lived happily ever after.

admiral sab · #6 10-01-2004, 02:47 AM

Aw man, I was getting excited! lol I love Hamlet! It's my favorite! I've seen it at the Shakespeare festival here in Montgomery, but I thought a 15 minute version would be fun. Five minutes seems too short and 20 too long, but 15 I think would be perfect.

LOL

Seriously I love Hamlet. It's the best.

Xeroc · #7 10-01-2004, 03:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hotaru

(yes, the highlight of my english class was the title of a thingy, english is REALLY boring)

The highlight of mine was where we all talked about Star Trek!

It's pretty small...

Chancellor Valium · #8 10-01-2004, 08:10 AM

How about 5MMacBeth? or is that Wyrd Sisters by Terry Pratchett?

Sa'ar Chasm · #9 10-01-2004, 12:09 PM

Wyrd Sisters is considerably longer than five minutes.

Chancellor Valium · #10 10-01-2004, 12:48 PM

It's probably funnier than a fiver of it, though.......I like that book.....and the opening of Maskerade works well too....
"When shall we, er, two meet again?"
"I can do next Tuesday. And you don't have to shout so. You made me drop my toast in the fire."

Opium · #11 10-06-2004, 11:38 AM

GAH! More Shakespeare! Too much of old Shakey! I...can't...take...it... *runs away, and is so traumatized that almost uses multiple !'s *

*comes back*
Hey, did you know William Shatner blames his sticato (sp?) Trek voice on the blank verse language he learned while being a classically trained Shakespearean actor?
*runs away again*

*again comes back*
The question is, then, why Patrick Stewart and Ian McKellan do not use the staccato (sp?) voice too.
*decides to stay and think a while about if has any more questions*
*reads above sentence*
*realizes has had too much coffee and too little sleep*
*attempts to leave computer*
*does so, eventually*

Chancellor Valium · #12 10-06-2004, 12:58 PM

staccato is the correct spelling. William Shatner isssssAN (major uber-obsessive stupidly long pause) Id......Iot!

Opium · #13 10-08-2004, 09:36 AM

Actually, for Shakespearean plays, William Shatner's style would work well. And in fact, Gene Roddenberry actually wanted that style for Star Trek!...the Shakespearean Hero thing. I think, though, by the time 1986 came around, and Mr Roddenberry was casting for ST:TNG, he perhaps realized that having a classically trained Shakespearean actor: Good. Having a Shakespearean-quality stage/movie actor who doesn't actually speak in the common Shakespearean dialect of the moment during a futuristic show: Even better. So came Patrick Stewart! At least that's my theory...