Zerg: GAK!
Terrans: GAK!
Stukov: Heheheh. Look at 'em go!
DuGalle: Jeez, do we have to overdo the evil "authorities looking down at peons getting killed" angle?
Stukov: Yes. Yes we do.
Aldaris: Well then. The Conclave is dead, and the remnants of the Zerg are ravaging our homeworld of Aiur!
Executor: Wait a second, you were a total dork last game. Also Raynor.
Raynor: Ahem.
Zeratul: Let's just head over to the Dark Protoss secret homeworld of Shakuras. Along with the annoying new Praetor.
Artanis: Yo.
Executor: Shouldn't we... you know, signal them so they don't shoot us accidentally?
Zeratul: An excellent idea. I'll radio Shakuras right away!
Artanis: This is your homeworld? What a dump.
Zeratul: Silence, impetuous youth!
Artanis: I'm 262 years old.
Zeratul: Right in the middle of the terrible twos!
Raszagal: I am the Dark Templar Matriarch. You'll notice I'm just here to prove that female Protoss do exist.
Artanis: As I represent the youth.
Raszagal: Yeah, who cares. Anyway, there's this temple on the other side of the planet. It requires two crystals in order to activate, which can be found --
Executor: Jeez, how long is all that going to take?
Raszagal: Most probably another six missions.
Executor: Crud.
Cerebrates: GAK!
Kerrigan: That was awesome.
Zeratul: Huh? You're evil incarnate, why are you so gung-ho cerebrate slaughter all of a sudden?
Kerrigan: Those were my enemies. By the way, Daggoth and his homies are attempting to create a new Overmind.
Aldaris: Impossible!
Raszagal: Silence, dork! We will do what Kerrigan asks.
Executor: But --
Raszagal: We are a proud race!
Executor: What's that supposed to mean, anyway?
Raszagal: Shut up and get the damned crystal. That's what.
Kerrigan: Got the crystal. Still trust me? Good.
Zeratul: It's like watching myself have a conversation!
Stukov: Surrender, puny non-Earthlings. I am Alexei Stukov of the United Earth Directorate, and --
Zeratul: Earth? They've come a long way.
Artanis: Permission to destroy them for no reason?
Zeratul: Granted.
Zeratul: We must secure the second crystal!
Artanis: We must destroy the Overmind!
Kerrigan: Let's do both.
Executor: Shhh...
Artanis and Zeratul: Okay.
Executor: Crap!
Kerrigan: You will probably need my help to --
The Overmind: GAK!
Kerrigan: (sigh) Do you always have to show off with your stupid carriers?
Raszagal: Hey, while you were doing something important, Aldaris did something really dorky.
Executor: Did he use the women's room instead of the men's?
Raszagal: Worse. He's rebelling against us because he's a racist. We must kill him so he cannot stain our --
Executor: "Our proud race," yada yada, I'm on it already.
Aldaris: I denounce all of you! Especially Kerrigan, who I found out is secretly -- GAK!
Kerrigan: Oops.
Artanis: Wait a second, you're THAT evil chick from the first game....
Kerrigan: Thanks for helping me kill the Overmind and stake a claim for leadership of the Zerg.
Executor: I told you guys. But did you listen? Nooooo....
Artanis: Just because I'm youthful doesn't mean I'm deaf. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got some Deftones to listen to.
Raszagal: Too long have we been pushed around by the Zerg! Let us fight back!
Executor: That's what we've been doing since the start of Episode III.
Raszagal: Don't mind me, I'm just being suspicious. Artanis, let us now bring the crystals to the temple which is once again swarming with Zerg. Artanis?
Artanis: Did you say something?
Zeratul: (sigh) I guess you'll need my help too.
Executor: You know, I've got carriers so I don't really need your --
Zeratul: Of course you do. They don't call us "heroes" for nothing.
Executor: Yes they do. Warcraft III this ain't.
Executor: Jeez, this level is impossible like a cow.
Artanis: What is it with you executors and "cow levels"? There is no cow level.
Zeratul: We have more important things at hand, like placing long-lost crystals in a strange temple!
Executor: Pffft, if you ask me this whole crystal thing is pretty lam--
Crystals: Woohoo! We're home!
All Zerg On Planet: GAK!
Executor: Er, right. Terran time.
(The Executor becomes the Commander at Ludicrous Speed)
TO BE CONTINUED....
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