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Zeke presents....

The Top 10 Signs That Your Girlfriend is Odo Undercover

  1. She keeps ogling Kira
  2. She used to take at least half an hour to change; now it's more like half a second
  3. Those Jem'Hadar punks don't hassle you in the corridor anymore
  4. She claims to be on a "no food or drink" diet
  5. She keeps joking about killing Quark... or at least you think she's joking
  6. Every 18 hours she takes a really long bathroom break, citing "feminine difficulties or something like that"
  7. It's like she has eyes in the back of her head
  8. You've never seen her and Odo in the same place, although by that reasoning she could also be Worf
  9. She got really mad when the Federation assigned you a Starfleet girlfriend as well
And the number one sign that your girlfriend is Odo undercover....
  1. All she wants to talk about anymore is your huge smuggling operation
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This list was originally published on May 10, 2006.

DISCLAIMER: Above all, don't try to take advantage of the situation by suggesting that she enlarge things.

All material © 2006, Colin Hayman.