The Monkey's Paw Game

[persianmouse]

They're not, but then they all have names like The Toronto Suck My Dick if You Don't Like My Biased Opinions, and The Quebec (something vulgar in French), and yell and insult you while you read them.

I wish I had webbed toes.

(pssst, that's perfectly fine about the showtunes and the burlap sack, I don't mind. :twisted

[Chancellor Valium]

You do, but everyone laughs at you.

I wish people found obscure '20s songs as funny as I do.......

[Opium]

Some people, such as Opium, do, and you realize you may have very weird tastes indeed.


I wish my professor would lighten up a little over attendance.

[Chancellor Valium]

He does. He lightens up so much he now stays in bed all day!

I wish for the resurrection of the greatest comedic genii ever to create the ultimate hilarious comedy show.......

[Opium]

He does return, but he returns as my professor, who is a woman and would only tell jokes that are funny to those who study English Literature extensivly.


I wish there was a D'OH avatar.

[Xeroc]

There is! Now - find it. :twisted:


I wish I had scratch-proof glass on my glasses.

[Opium]

You have scratch-proof glasses, but they are made of diamond and are so valuable you have to keep them in a safe all the time, so you never actually wear them.


I wish the new OLP single was on at least once an hour on the radio station I listen to.

[Chancellor Valium]

They do. And you become sick of it. And they keep playing it until YOUR BRAIN DECOMPRESSES! AHAHAHAA! Ahem.

I wish sanity was a bit easier to achieve....

[persianmouse]

It is, but then life becomes so very dull....

I wish I wasn't lactose-intolerant.

[Chancellor Valium]

You're not. But the trade-off is that you have to change your name to Oestrogen F. Pottingshed, and everyone laughs at you All. Day. Long.

I wish those Hyper-Tiny Mutant Llamas would GO AWAY!

[persianmouse]

Fine, they go away, but now you have nothing to carry around all your tiny bindels full of tiny spices and tiny silks on the tiny trade route from tiny Nepal to tiny Constantinople.

I wish I lived in a world designed by Neil Gaiman...

[Chancellor Valium]

You do. You get killed when you fail to escape to Mornington Crescent, though.

I wish more people played Mornington Crescent.

[NeoMatrix]

We try, but we end up falling asleep reading the directions

I wish someone would come up with a new game for us to play on here.

[Chancellor Valium]

I have, but no-one plays them

I wish people would post more.

[Xeroc]

They do, but it's all nonsense ... all nonsense! Wait ...


I wish to be able to move at the speed of light!

[Chancellor Valium]

You can, but you die in the process of collapsing down to a point of infinite density but no mass (is that the right way round?)

I wish it was sunny.

[NAHTMMM]

It's sunny.

This probably means trouble on a global scale, because it's midnight at the moment...



I wish people were kinder to each other.

[persianmouse]

People are nicer to each other, but that makes us the Star Trek universe, so our universe, and everything in it gets cancelled.

I wish that the Enterprise relaunch in books is actually good.

[Chancellor Valium]

It is. Unfortunately, it's not actually much to do with Enterprise - the pilot novel is in fact called "Doctor Who and the Prisoner of Alderaan".

I wish more people were around to chat.......

[NeoMatrix]

There are, but they are sex offenders who just want to talk dirty to you.

I wish for the entire star trek collection on DVD