September 10 (TJI #49)

[Zeke]

Finally! My summer work is now done, after a massively busy month. How busy, you ask? Oh, I'll tell you how busy: I haven't seen Snakes on a Plane yet. THAT'S how motherf***ing busy.

To start things moving again, here's my first TJI in quite a while. (It would have been better timed a week or two ago, but what're you gonna do?) Lock the doors, folks, because tonight is the night they drove old Dixie down... well, actually it's the night they destroyed Pluto, but that doesn't scan.

[PointyHairedJedi]

Content! Sweet, juicy content!

I particularly liked Darth's cameo.

[Derek]

"Pluto got sent to Hades? Oh, Dis!" remarked ancient historian Mark "Scooter" Wilson. Smartass.

Heh.

And you really don't think much of people who use water to fight, do you?

[Sa'ar Chasm]

We never liked it all that much -- our relationship with it has been plutonic at best

Recently they'd taken to picketing observatories, carrying 'Eden was a utopia, not a Plutopia'

We've expanded the frontiers of explodology and struck a blow against plutocrats everywhere.

Argh. Just...arrrrrgh.

That first pun stuck out rather intrusively... it was a bit earthier than I'm used to.

"It was really hard. Except the part where Aquaman tried to stop me, claiming that there could conceivably be fish frozen in the ice of Pluto, and I beat him around for a while. That was easy."

So are Aquaman jokes.

They're saying that by destroying Pluto, we've made all their detailed formulas and calculations worthless. Apparently they'll have to work everything out again. To save them the trouble, we've sent them a box of magic 8-balls;

Zing!

Nice to see you back in form, Zeke.

[Asky]

August 2009, eh? On August 24, 2006, Pluto was about 30.76 AU away from Earth, or about 92.956×10^6 miles or about 149.598×10^6 kilometers. From Aug. 24, 2006 to Aug. 3, 2009, there are 365+1-(24-3) or 345 days. To reach Earth by Aug. 3, 2009, the fragments would have to be travelling at 11,226 mph or 18,067 kph. Discounting whatever effect the atmosphere would have on the fragments (or vice versa), I don't think staying indoors would help you much.

[rereads] Ohhhh, wait, now I get it. Never mind.

[Zeke]

You do? Because I think you were right the first time. I just meant rock fragments. (And I knew someone would do the calculations... that or just point out how unlikely it is that fragments of Pluto would happen to cross Earth's orbit.)

Derek: If you mean my mockery of the Salt Water weapon in the fifth Game Boy MM game, it's actually the same guy. That was the game with bosses named after planets.

Sa'ar: Mocking Aquaman is a running joke at Frank J's website, IMAO.us. I couldn't resist throwing it in.

[mudshark]

Originally Posted by Sa'ar Chasm

Argh. Just...arrrrrgh.

That first pun stuck out rather intrusively... it was a bit earthier than I'm used to.

Arrrrrrgh.

[Sa'ar Chasm]

I thought turnabout was fair play in this instance.

[Chancellor Valium]

Originally Posted by Zeke

"Pluto got sent to Hades? Oh, Dis!" remarked classical historian Mark "Scooter" Wilson. Smartass.

Fixed for differential accuracy

[Zeke]

I wondered about that too, but I checked Scooter's website and "ancient historian" was his own wording.

[Scooter]

Originally Posted by Zeke

I wondered about that too, but I checked Scooter's website and "ancient historian" was his own wording.

As much as I would prefer to be classical than ancient, all other things being equal, "classical" refers to a narrower range of history than "ancient."